Thursday, April 30, 2009

I have feared making mistakes because I have not wanted to be known as someone who is often wrong. So when I have been wrong, I have hidden that past, so that I am not judged upon that error. So from all of this, I create a secret world within, that apparently, only I know about. But in this hiding and covering up, I have become the manifestation of dishonesty. This dishonesty is distributed unto the world, because that is who I really have become. There is no way out of this reality, as long as this is allowed to continue.

This hiding or covering up something in the past, attaches me to the past, even though there is no past that actually exists. Yet, because in hiding the past, I carry it with me in my mind, and my actions are based upon an event that, in reality, does not exist. Therefore the reality of the current moment ends up with me acting totally in an imaginary world, instead of here, in the moment, with what actually exists.

The initial error does not carry forth into the future. But reacting to the error is what binds me to an illusion filled world. Because, from the starting point of disguising or reacting to the error, I have accepted an illusion as real, and so the reality of me becomes an illusion that is fed into the reality of this world.

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