The dedication to myself to remain here as myself in every moment of every breath. Seems like a daunting task. But is there anything else that is of any value? To allow polarity to pull me around in all directions that lead nowhere but away from who I am here is existence as a slave to the mind. It may take years or lifetimes to remain here in every moment, but is there anything else that has precendence over self honor? To allow oneself to be pulled in all directions is suppression of self here. It reduces self to a voiceless expressionless being that does not stand as self, but exists as not existing as self. In this there is no self, only fabrications of illusion and all that is not here. It is common sense to see that in remaining self here, self gives all that exists here to self. Giving up the things that we have for so long believed holds the key to our happiness, grants us ourself in entirety. In this we inherit existence as self here. The illusion that we actually give something up is complete nonsense. For self does not exist, until self is here. To think that we give ourselves a treat by indulging in desires of the mind is to ignore self as the self honest expression in which one actually lives for the first time in existence. To think that that is treating oneself to something of any value is self deceit. A raping of self by self to remain enslaved to an existence of suppression and betrayal.
The egomaniacal image of self that has existed as me, has fooled me of my own accord. I have allowed this to continue because I have believed that I will somehow become greater than me. It is the logic of greed within that I will somehow have gained something for nothing. Yet the price of this is nothing short of discardment of my entire self in return for a fading existence. To exist as unstability and unsubstantiality. To hide beneath mountains of images and desires until self is longer aware that self even exists, but as smoke and mirrors. It is only to stand as self here in every moment within self honesty and self forgiveness of what one sees. It is to remain here as self that allows uncompromising honor unto self to exist here as one and equal to the self honest expression of existence as self.